For those of you who are regular readers of my blog, you may be wondering why I keep changing the background. Well, it is very simple - I can't make up my mind on what I want. I usually make decisions very quickly and easily but as far as this blog goes - not so much!!
This latest background I do like better than the old but it is still not me. I have looked at all the blog background sites and just cannot make up my mind - although I am close!
Bear with me and in the meantime, I hope you like this newest background a little better - if not, more change is coming, I promise!!
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
A Servant's Heart
I have not said that much about my wonderful husband since I started this blog so, I thought today would be a great day to talk about my Stephen.
He is my best friend, soul mate and my very own Prince Charming. It seems like we have been together forever and the more I know about this incredible man, the more I love him.
Over the years, he has had to step into some roles that we never would have anticipated. It has become harder and harder for me to do the things I did so long ago and he has had to come and take my place in those things.
He does all of the washing, the dishes and driving for our family - just to name a few. I have never heard that man complain in 20 years. He absolutely amazes me on a minute by minute basis. His ability to serve our family in such a Christ focused way, even on the days I know he is just about out of steam, always brings me to my knees. And I always think to myself, "Would I be able to do this like him if the tables were turned?" I just don't know, I would like to think so, but the truth is I just don't know...
He has allowed the God that he loves so much to strengthen him every day to that he can serve his family with his whole heart. And I know it has not been easy, to say the least.
For almost the last year he has not only ran his own business but he has had to take on a second job as our family (like many others) has been dealing with financial upheaval in ways we thought were long behind us. I have seen him, over this time, look almost dead on his feet. My heart breaks because I am so limited in ways to help him. But we remain strong in the Lord, knowing He alone will provide for us in all things.
Through it all Stephen always has a smile on his face and is ready to help anyone and everyone who is in need - never thinking of himself.
One of the areas that is difficult for me is having to use the "little girls" room in the middle of the night. I have to have help and of course cannot go alone so, I must wake up my sleeping husband, who may have only been in bed a short while himself. It tares at my heart to do this but, going to the bathroom is just one of those things that will not change - it is true, when you have to go, you have to go.
Every time we have to have this "outing" in the middle of the night, I am greeted with the same words. "It's all right, honey. Whatever you need, I am glad to help you in any way I can." Quite a guy, my husband and one day I would love to be more like him.
I think we can all learn from Stephen in the area of service - I know I have a long way to go but, I am learning. God's Word is very clear on the subject...
"Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:3-4
I know it will be my great joy to try and emulate my precious husband as he lives out God's Word in serving each day. I pray as we all go through our lives we will strive to be others centered.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
**** A Special Thank You**** I am so very blessed and thankful for all of my readers. Some of you I know as wonderful friends and I love you and thank you for your support of this new area of ministry in which God is leading me. Those of you whom I do not know, I have to say you are also such a treasure to me. Thank you for the sweet comments - I read them all and love them! Thanks for blessing me in untold ways.
He is my best friend, soul mate and my very own Prince Charming. It seems like we have been together forever and the more I know about this incredible man, the more I love him.
Over the years, he has had to step into some roles that we never would have anticipated. It has become harder and harder for me to do the things I did so long ago and he has had to come and take my place in those things.
He does all of the washing, the dishes and driving for our family - just to name a few. I have never heard that man complain in 20 years. He absolutely amazes me on a minute by minute basis. His ability to serve our family in such a Christ focused way, even on the days I know he is just about out of steam, always brings me to my knees. And I always think to myself, "Would I be able to do this like him if the tables were turned?" I just don't know, I would like to think so, but the truth is I just don't know...
He has allowed the God that he loves so much to strengthen him every day to that he can serve his family with his whole heart. And I know it has not been easy, to say the least.
For almost the last year he has not only ran his own business but he has had to take on a second job as our family (like many others) has been dealing with financial upheaval in ways we thought were long behind us. I have seen him, over this time, look almost dead on his feet. My heart breaks because I am so limited in ways to help him. But we remain strong in the Lord, knowing He alone will provide for us in all things.
Through it all Stephen always has a smile on his face and is ready to help anyone and everyone who is in need - never thinking of himself.
One of the areas that is difficult for me is having to use the "little girls" room in the middle of the night. I have to have help and of course cannot go alone so, I must wake up my sleeping husband, who may have only been in bed a short while himself. It tares at my heart to do this but, going to the bathroom is just one of those things that will not change - it is true, when you have to go, you have to go.
Every time we have to have this "outing" in the middle of the night, I am greeted with the same words. "It's all right, honey. Whatever you need, I am glad to help you in any way I can." Quite a guy, my husband and one day I would love to be more like him.
I think we can all learn from Stephen in the area of service - I know I have a long way to go but, I am learning. God's Word is very clear on the subject...
"Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others." Philippians 2:3-4
I know it will be my great joy to try and emulate my precious husband as he lives out God's Word in serving each day. I pray as we all go through our lives we will strive to be others centered.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
**** A Special Thank You**** I am so very blessed and thankful for all of my readers. Some of you I know as wonderful friends and I love you and thank you for your support of this new area of ministry in which God is leading me. Those of you whom I do not know, I have to say you are also such a treasure to me. Thank you for the sweet comments - I read them all and love them! Thanks for blessing me in untold ways.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Wonderful Day...
Yesterday I spoke at our church's MOMS group. What an incredible group of women of all ages - I was truly amazed.
The first speaker was one of the Titus Moms who spoke on the book the group is currently reading, she was VERY good and I was quite intimidated to follow her! A few minutes after she spoke, it was my turn and I think I did fine. I know one thing for certain though, these precious women blessed me far more than I could have blessed them and I am so thankful for the opportunity to share what the Lord has done and is still doing in my life. It really is overwhelming to me that anyone would want to sit to listen to anything I have to say. I am grateful beyond words to the Lord for giving me the words to speak and the calm heart that I needed to speak them. I pray that the ladies were blessed and praise God for the whole experience - to God be the glory!
They all were very gracious, loving and so welcoming - I felt like I had been apart of the group all along! Thank you to my sweet friends Melissa and Michelle for asking me to speak - you are both wonderful women of God and I treasure you both!
On a side note though, I had planned to take a couple of pictures and post them but, as always, I forgot the camera! For someone who loves to scrapbook as much as I do, I sure leave home without the camera more times than not - maybe next time.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
The first speaker was one of the Titus Moms who spoke on the book the group is currently reading, she was VERY good and I was quite intimidated to follow her! A few minutes after she spoke, it was my turn and I think I did fine. I know one thing for certain though, these precious women blessed me far more than I could have blessed them and I am so thankful for the opportunity to share what the Lord has done and is still doing in my life. It really is overwhelming to me that anyone would want to sit to listen to anything I have to say. I am grateful beyond words to the Lord for giving me the words to speak and the calm heart that I needed to speak them. I pray that the ladies were blessed and praise God for the whole experience - to God be the glory!
They all were very gracious, loving and so welcoming - I felt like I had been apart of the group all along! Thank you to my sweet friends Melissa and Michelle for asking me to speak - you are both wonderful women of God and I treasure you both!
On a side note though, I had planned to take a couple of pictures and post them but, as always, I forgot the camera! For someone who loves to scrapbook as much as I do, I sure leave home without the camera more times than not - maybe next time.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Sunday, January 24, 2010
MOMS
Tomorrow is the day!! I will be speaking at our MOMS group in the morning. Please pray for me tomorrow morning as I share. Pray for a calm heart, right words and most of all that the ladies there would not even notice me but would only see and hear the work and power of the Lord.
Thanks to all of my precious readers for praying and supporting me in this new area of ministry. I have no idea where the Lord wants to take me but I am willing to follow...
I will post an update later in the week.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Thanks to all of my precious readers for praying and supporting me in this new area of ministry. I have no idea where the Lord wants to take me but I am willing to follow...
I will post an update later in the week.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Short and Sweet...
This week I will have only this one short and sweet post. I have been asked to speak at our church's MOMS (Mothers of Many Seasons) group, I will be giving my testimony and speaking on "Knowing the Lord in hard times" so, I will need this week to prepare. I will be speaking next Monday, the 25th.
Please pray for me this week. Ask the Lord to give me wisdom and a calm heart,(I am a bundle of nerves). Also, and most importantly, pray that God will be honored and glorified in all that I say.
The next time I post I will let everyone know how it went... unless it goes awful, in that case I will never speak of it again! Have a blessed week as you walk with the King of Kings and Lord of Lords!
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Please pray for me this week. Ask the Lord to give me wisdom and a calm heart,(I am a bundle of nerves). Also, and most importantly, pray that God will be honored and glorified in all that I say.
The next time I post I will let everyone know how it went... unless it goes awful, in that case I will never speak of it again! Have a blessed week as you walk with the King of Kings and Lord of Lords!
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Cry to the Lord
Several years ago I went through a time of depression over the losses in my life and the hardship of being disabled. Times like these come and go and I am happy to say that they do not plague me as often as they used to - praise God.
As I was going through this valley, I began to have a warped view of crying and decided there would be no more tears from me at all. So, this blog post is for all those who think they must be strong at all times and never shed a tear - the Lord taught me so much during this time and I pray He will use this to do the same with you.
So, that was it - no more tears, I just thought I would go through the rest of my life with pain, heartache, losses and disability without ever having any true emotion about it again. For those of you who know me best, this was almost impossible because I have a VERY tender heart and cry over almost everything - something I inherited from my tender-hearted mother and for which I am so thankful.
But back then I was determined to be tough, I thought I had cried enough. This is a journal entry from that time and my thinking on the whole crying thing:
"I feel really awful today and I have continued to have more and more seizures which has not helped anything. I could sit and cry for hours - that is how intense the pain is in my heart today. But, I have decided that I am not going to cry - and I didn't all day. It took everything in me - but no tears. With all the hurt, disease, cancer, people who can't see, hear, have no arms or legs... how dare I sit and cry over my few seizures and loss of mobility. Please Lord, help me through this time and allow me be be strong."
A few days later God had me in the Psalms - I know I have said this before but that is the place to be if you are facing a trial. He began to show me how David and the other Psalmists CRIED, but they had purpose in their crying. They cried out to their Mighty and Loving God.
I learned during this season that God already knows how my heart is aching, He knows every thought I have ever had - He is never surprised at what might come out of my mouth or cross my mind. He just wants me to bring all of that to Him so that He can bring me the peace and comfort that can only come from him. The tears can be healing, IF they are cried out to my Savior, leaning on Him and realizing that I need Him alone to see me through.
If you are in need of a good cry but think you have to stay strong in all things, allow the Word of God to penetrate your heart today:
"But You, O Lord, are a shield for me, My glory and the One who lifts my up head. I cried to the Lord with my voice and He heard me from His holy hill." Psalm 3:3-4
"Hear me when I call O God of my righteousness. You have relieved me in my distress; have mercy on me and hear my prayer." Psalm 4:1
"Give ear to my words, O Lord, consider my meditation. Give heed to the voice of my cry, my King and my God. For to you I will pray, my voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; in the morning I will direct it to You and I will look up." Psalm 5:1-3
"In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried out to my God; He heard my voice from His temple, and my cry came before Him, even to His ears." Psalm 18:6
Those are only a few examples and I don't know about you but it makes me want to jump out of my skin to think that the God of the Universe hears MY voice and it comes straight to His ears. What we say and how we feel matters to God. I pray today if your heart is bleeding and you just can't take the pain anymore, sit and cry with the God who loves you more than you will ever know. God doesn't want us to be tough, he wants to have a relationship with us and to hold us in His loving Hand - allow Him to comfort your soul.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
As I was going through this valley, I began to have a warped view of crying and decided there would be no more tears from me at all. So, this blog post is for all those who think they must be strong at all times and never shed a tear - the Lord taught me so much during this time and I pray He will use this to do the same with you.
So, that was it - no more tears, I just thought I would go through the rest of my life with pain, heartache, losses and disability without ever having any true emotion about it again. For those of you who know me best, this was almost impossible because I have a VERY tender heart and cry over almost everything - something I inherited from my tender-hearted mother and for which I am so thankful.
But back then I was determined to be tough, I thought I had cried enough. This is a journal entry from that time and my thinking on the whole crying thing:
"I feel really awful today and I have continued to have more and more seizures which has not helped anything. I could sit and cry for hours - that is how intense the pain is in my heart today. But, I have decided that I am not going to cry - and I didn't all day. It took everything in me - but no tears. With all the hurt, disease, cancer, people who can't see, hear, have no arms or legs... how dare I sit and cry over my few seizures and loss of mobility. Please Lord, help me through this time and allow me be be strong."
A few days later God had me in the Psalms - I know I have said this before but that is the place to be if you are facing a trial. He began to show me how David and the other Psalmists CRIED, but they had purpose in their crying. They cried out to their Mighty and Loving God.
I learned during this season that God already knows how my heart is aching, He knows every thought I have ever had - He is never surprised at what might come out of my mouth or cross my mind. He just wants me to bring all of that to Him so that He can bring me the peace and comfort that can only come from him. The tears can be healing, IF they are cried out to my Savior, leaning on Him and realizing that I need Him alone to see me through.
If you are in need of a good cry but think you have to stay strong in all things, allow the Word of God to penetrate your heart today:
"But You, O Lord, are a shield for me, My glory and the One who lifts my up head. I cried to the Lord with my voice and He heard me from His holy hill." Psalm 3:3-4
"Hear me when I call O God of my righteousness. You have relieved me in my distress; have mercy on me and hear my prayer." Psalm 4:1
"Give ear to my words, O Lord, consider my meditation. Give heed to the voice of my cry, my King and my God. For to you I will pray, my voice You shall hear in the morning, O Lord; in the morning I will direct it to You and I will look up." Psalm 5:1-3
"In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried out to my God; He heard my voice from His temple, and my cry came before Him, even to His ears." Psalm 18:6
Those are only a few examples and I don't know about you but it makes me want to jump out of my skin to think that the God of the Universe hears MY voice and it comes straight to His ears. What we say and how we feel matters to God. I pray today if your heart is bleeding and you just can't take the pain anymore, sit and cry with the God who loves you more than you will ever know. God doesn't want us to be tough, he wants to have a relationship with us and to hold us in His loving Hand - allow Him to comfort your soul.
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Monday, January 11, 2010
Mistakes and Mercy
Saturday I lost my temper with my wonderful husband of 20 years. It was nothing serious, just one of those things that rubbed me the wrong way and before you knew it I had taken on an attitude that was very contrary to the Christ I follow.
I was angry, unpleasant and rude. My heart breaks now just thinking about it - I hate it when I am rude. It does upset me because of the way that I treated the man that I love so much and that I know God has given me as the perfect provision for my life, this is true, but mostly I get upset over times like this because I have offended my God. I have chosen to step out of the Christian skin I wear each day and become ugly - not consulting the Lord on anything, just letting all the wrong words fly out of my mouth.
I tend to carry moments like this with me for a long while, making it even worse and giving Satan the opportunity to work in my mind. Oh yes, he throws all kinds of things at us when we are not looking! He began to try to convince me that I was a horrible wife, and for that matter a horrible person - lies flooded my mind about how my walk with the Lord was completely compromised because of this disagreement with Stephen.If no one has ever told you, let me be the first, our minds are a battlefield!
I am always amazed at the mercy of God - and the timing. In the midst of all my thinking and self loathing God broke through...
Roxanne, I am your Redeemer God and forgiveness is yours. I love you no matter what.
I am overwhelmed at the greatness of God. That He would take time to come down to where I am and remind ME, a sinner for sure, that He loves me and will once again forgive me and close that gap (that I created!) between He and I. Isn't God good?
So, as I write this today I am reminded of how big God is and how small I am. He is bigger than my sin, my attitude and any kind of thinking about myself that I could ever dish up... and He will again choose to forgive, it is almost too much for my little pea sized brain to grasp.
Thankful today for the mercy of Almighty God and praying for you, my sweet readers, that wherever you are in your walk with the Lord, that you will remember that He loves you so much and is ready to forgive whatever gap you might have created.
"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
I was angry, unpleasant and rude. My heart breaks now just thinking about it - I hate it when I am rude. It does upset me because of the way that I treated the man that I love so much and that I know God has given me as the perfect provision for my life, this is true, but mostly I get upset over times like this because I have offended my God. I have chosen to step out of the Christian skin I wear each day and become ugly - not consulting the Lord on anything, just letting all the wrong words fly out of my mouth.
I tend to carry moments like this with me for a long while, making it even worse and giving Satan the opportunity to work in my mind. Oh yes, he throws all kinds of things at us when we are not looking! He began to try to convince me that I was a horrible wife, and for that matter a horrible person - lies flooded my mind about how my walk with the Lord was completely compromised because of this disagreement with Stephen.If no one has ever told you, let me be the first, our minds are a battlefield!
I am always amazed at the mercy of God - and the timing. In the midst of all my thinking and self loathing God broke through...
Roxanne, I am your Redeemer God and forgiveness is yours. I love you no matter what.
I am overwhelmed at the greatness of God. That He would take time to come down to where I am and remind ME, a sinner for sure, that He loves me and will once again forgive me and close that gap (that I created!) between He and I. Isn't God good?
So, as I write this today I am reminded of how big God is and how small I am. He is bigger than my sin, my attitude and any kind of thinking about myself that I could ever dish up... and He will again choose to forgive, it is almost too much for my little pea sized brain to grasp.
Thankful today for the mercy of Almighty God and praying for you, my sweet readers, that wherever you are in your walk with the Lord, that you will remember that He loves you so much and is ready to forgive whatever gap you might have created.
"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
But for a moment
This past week has been a tough one for me. Lots of seizures, including a fall. But most of all it has been the little things, the things that no one else sees or knows about. Just me and God.
Things like not being able to move fast enough, get the things that are just out of my reach or getting stuck in areas with my wheelchair - that is REALLY frustrating!
These are the little issues of life that make me want to get up and move like most everybody else. And this week has been heaps and heaps of tiny things like this that reek havoc on my emotions.
Being a disabled person, I tend to think about Heaven a lot. Not just because I will have a glorified body that works perfectly - although that is a big plus. I also tend to think about what it will be like to see my Jesus face to face, to worship at His feet and sing endless praise songs to Him. What a day that will be!! But until then, I am here dealing with the hardships of life just like everyone else.
When I have days and weeks that almost overwhelm me - like this last week. I am so thankful that I can drag myself, (once again) bloody and bruised to the foot of the Cross. Jesus will again pick me up, clean me off and speak words of life to me that I so need to hear.
I have several Words of Life that comfort and minister to me on my hardest days, I pray they will do the same for you as you struggle or your heart is breaking. Just remember, if you know Jesus, this world we live in is just a pit stop on the way to our Heavenly Home - that thought alone should make us all rejoice a little louder today.
First nugget of truth... Romans 8:18 "For I consider the sufferings of this present time not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed in us"
I love this verse. It speaks volumes to me. NOTHING that we go through in this life even comes close to the majesty and glory of walking hand in hand with our Savior. Sign me up - I am ready right now!
Next nugget... 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 "Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction is but for a moment, which is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal."
I also love this verse. God has used it so many times to bring me back to His perspective, reminding me that not only is He working in me for my good and His glory . But also what He is doing may be unseen but it is eternal, never ending and glorious.
Last nugget... James 1:2-4 "My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing."
I know at first glance it sounds crazy to be joyful for the trials in our life but this is a God way of thinking that only He can accomplish. It has taken me many, many years to be joyful in my sufferings - and there are still lots of days that I am not. But I have decided to choose joy because it honors the Lord - and I want to be perfect, lacking nothing. This does not mean perfect as in never making a mistake, it means that I am allowing God to work in and through me daily to make me more like Him. Believe me there is nothing I want more than that!
So, as always it all comes down to Jesus. I am becoming more like Him each day as I learn to struggle with grace and the mind of Christ. Thank you Lord for hard weeks that bring me back to You!
"Only in suffering do we learn to fully delight in God's goodness." - Martin Luther
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
Things like not being able to move fast enough, get the things that are just out of my reach or getting stuck in areas with my wheelchair - that is REALLY frustrating!
These are the little issues of life that make me want to get up and move like most everybody else. And this week has been heaps and heaps of tiny things like this that reek havoc on my emotions.
Being a disabled person, I tend to think about Heaven a lot. Not just because I will have a glorified body that works perfectly - although that is a big plus. I also tend to think about what it will be like to see my Jesus face to face, to worship at His feet and sing endless praise songs to Him. What a day that will be!! But until then, I am here dealing with the hardships of life just like everyone else.
When I have days and weeks that almost overwhelm me - like this last week. I am so thankful that I can drag myself, (once again) bloody and bruised to the foot of the Cross. Jesus will again pick me up, clean me off and speak words of life to me that I so need to hear.
I have several Words of Life that comfort and minister to me on my hardest days, I pray they will do the same for you as you struggle or your heart is breaking. Just remember, if you know Jesus, this world we live in is just a pit stop on the way to our Heavenly Home - that thought alone should make us all rejoice a little louder today.
First nugget of truth... Romans 8:18 "For I consider the sufferings of this present time not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed in us"
I love this verse. It speaks volumes to me. NOTHING that we go through in this life even comes close to the majesty and glory of walking hand in hand with our Savior. Sign me up - I am ready right now!
Next nugget... 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 "Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction is but for a moment, which is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal."
I also love this verse. God has used it so many times to bring me back to His perspective, reminding me that not only is He working in me for my good and His glory . But also what He is doing may be unseen but it is eternal, never ending and glorious.
Last nugget... James 1:2-4 "My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing."
I know at first glance it sounds crazy to be joyful for the trials in our life but this is a God way of thinking that only He can accomplish. It has taken me many, many years to be joyful in my sufferings - and there are still lots of days that I am not. But I have decided to choose joy because it honors the Lord - and I want to be perfect, lacking nothing. This does not mean perfect as in never making a mistake, it means that I am allowing God to work in and through me daily to make me more like Him. Believe me there is nothing I want more than that!
So, as always it all comes down to Jesus. I am becoming more like Him each day as I learn to struggle with grace and the mind of Christ. Thank you Lord for hard weeks that bring me back to You!
"Only in suffering do we learn to fully delight in God's goodness." - Martin Luther
Rejoicing in Hope,
Roxanne
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